Big Shoes

In discussing his famous father Lloyd, Beau Bridges said "My father was my teacher. But most importantly he was a great dad." And I think that sums up Dad and Papa to a tee.Indeed, Dad was our teacher - he loved showing us how to do things. One of my earliest memories were him helping me learn how to ride a bike. A few years later in the Cub Scouts, he taught me the skills necessary to earn the various badges and how to make a pinewood derby car. Those periodic lessons continued throughout my life even into adulthood. Yet the best lessons were the ones that Dad taught which inspired me to become who I am today.Before I was old enough to legally hunt, Dad would take me hunting - teaching me how to be a sportsman so I would be ready when I came of age. Although I no longer hunt as an adult, the lessons learned while hunting were much broader than simply how to shoot a gun and field dress a game animal. Dad loved being outdoors - he always seemed at peace when we were in the woods. It didn't matter if we bagged anything or not. The simple act of being outside brought him joy. Today when I am hiking, cycling, or camping I will recall a memory of being with him somewhere outside.Most recently, I was in Colorado hiking in the Rocky Mountain National Park. After my hike, I stopped along the road to watch a beautiful herd of Elk grazing. While enjoying these majestic animals, I started to recall the week I spent with him and my cousin Bob on a hunting trip in the Arapaho National Forest. Unfortunately, we never came across any herd like this, but we had a wonderful time in one of the most beautiful areas in our country - it was a memory that has lasted a lifetime.Today, my love of wild places and the outdoors is a direct result of the lessons he taught me about respecting nature and protecting the places we love. Now, I actively advocate for outdoor conservation and the protection of public lands.As a steamfitter, Dad was the stereotypical working class person. More importantly, he was a skilled craftsman - talented at using both his head and his hands to build complex engineering systems. At one point prior to high school, I thought I wanted to follow Dad into the trade. However, unlike my brother Darrell, I could not weld or do any of the hands-on-things a steamfitter needed to be able to do. I think Dad knew that. He encouraged me to excel in math and science - to become an engineer. Still, the real lesson he taught me was to never underestimate the knowledge and skills of those who work for you.While in college, Dad would share with me the challenges of working with young arrogant engineers - instilling in me that despite the engineering degree I was destined to receive, it did not make me an expert. This served me well as I pursued my Navy and later careers. Although my arrogance did manifest itself many times during my career, I would always come back to seeing my Dad in those who worked for me. And when I did - my arrogance would abate and ultimately success would be assured. I am a better leader and manager because Dad taught me the value of good people.Now, I would be remiss if I do not mention two of Dad's most notable qualities. In many ways, all four of his children (And I believe all his grandchildren too) were cursed and blessed with these same traits. To begin, it may surprise many of you, but Dad was stubborn - then again, maybe it's not surprising. This was frustrating to many of us, but it was his way of protecting himself when he felt most vulnerable. It became more and more noticeable as he got older, which we all realized. Ultimately, we learned how to manage Dad when he was his most stubborn.And here lies the curse - I think all four of us kids share this trait. But as I get older, I try - perhaps poorly - not to be too stubborn. Fortunately, I have Lisa to call me out on it. In fact, she has an endearing pet name she calls me: "David H."Despite how stubborn Dad may have been, he was equally if not more gregarious. He could make friends with anyone and once you were his friend you mattered to him. This was his greatest gift. Like his father, friends and family could rely on him to help when needed. Without a doubt, this is one of the best traits we received from Dad - the blessing. In our own way, each of us honor him every time we step up to help family or a friend. As we go on from here, we can be comforted knowing that Dad will now always be with us when we do.Finally, many years ago, I saw a painting of a son trying to wear his father's shoes. It resonated with me because, I remember trying to wear Dad's shoes when I was a boy. After I saw that painting, I was inspired to write a poem. It had several versus, but with a repeating theme that went like this:

He has two small feet in one large shoe

He wants to wear them both but

He has two small feet in one large shoe

A size that will never fit

The irony is my Dad had small feet. I believe I may have fit in his shoes briefly in Middle School, but quickly outgrew them. Nevertheless, Dad's shoes were quite big.Now it will take each of us - children and grandchildren - to fill them. I quite am certain Dad and Papa knew we were ready.Obituary for David H Petri posted on February 11th 2017